Day 191/366

My first day of an official job as an employee was nothing like what everyone told me it would be. It was probably the fact that I'd already interned at the place and nothing felt new. But it should have been something!

Rejected story ideas, a quiet lunch with the colleagues thanks to my newly developed shyness and filing 2 stories that won't really help any reader. Sounds fun? Well, at least the lunch and coffee was good!

I'm beginning to think that continuing formal education wasn't as bad an idea as I'd thought it would be. Of course, the first day of my first job would be an inevitable occurrence. But maybe writing for a newspaper was better as an intern.

Or maybe I'm just doing it wrong. But it's a little hard to get it right in a city that you don't belong to. Hopefully, the city and its people will warm up to me. I have to start socializing for that and when you're living with family members, that's also a little hard. All I know is that I'm going to appreciate alcohol and holidays much more than I ever had in life. God bless me!

Day 182/366

The residues of my mind are being devoured by the tension. There is vomit in my system that is dying to come out. I shouldn't have eaten that extra helping of my aunt's delicious pasta at lunch. This is as uneasy as I have ever felt.

2 days ago, I wrote a copy test to enter this newspaper. It went fine, I'd thought. Seeing a 60/100 on the answer sheet today made me think otherwise.

The editor and sub-editor were sitting across me and bombarding me with questions that I didn't feel like answering under pressure - Why did I go to boarding school? Why do I want to work in Bangalore of all places? What do I think of Calcutta's newspapers viz-a-viz Bangalore's? Why am I not pursuing further education? I heaved an inaudible sigh and answered them one by one. I think my tummy ache kicked in somewhere in the middle of the interview and I started talking more than I was supposed to. I was excited and nervous and curious as to what this seemingly neverending conversation would lead to.

I'm sitting on the sofa outside the editor's office typing this. I'm praying to a God I remember rarely and hoping I get this job. I am queasy as hell and wish the feeling would go away. But the editors are having a meeting in the conference room where I would pitch story ideas every Monday morning during my internship. My head is spinning and the world in front of me is going blurry and then coming back to focus. Make it stop. Just tell me already!
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I was finally called into the office around 4 p.m. The sub-editor handed me an application form. "You can start your job as soon as the paperwork is processed," he said with a smile. I took it and thanked him and left the office grinning from ear to ear.

Yes, I'm going to start my first job as a reporter very, very soon.

Bangalore, land of hot chocolate fudge, I can't wait to explore you.

First job: ✓